Friday, December 04, 2009

Being a loser...

all the time, everywhere, in everything makes you lose life.. Thats where I currently stand. I have reached a stage in life, wherein I have a firm belief that nothing can ever go right for me. No matter how much effort I put in, how much I want it badly, how much I work towards it, I am not meant for it at all. It seems as if, life has decided to pull me down and put me in the deepest of dumps whenever I try to get up and take a hold on myself. Even the tears have refused to well up in my eyes. Either they have dried or my eyes have refused to cry anymore.. I have started reaching a stage where sometimes, nothing effects me nor do I feel anything.. Am I turning into a stone. I dont want to. I want my feelings to remain intact, but somehow its not happening. I seem to be losing myself with every passing day. The smile is fading away. There is no expression on the face. I appear as a stone hearted person who is not moved by any event. I dont want to be like that. I want my faith to be intact. I dont want to lose trust. I dont want to give up. But its not happening. I need a respite and a break from everyone and everything.

7 comments:

indra said...

Hey Soulmate!
I follow your blog, through a blog friend. anyways..
What about your guitaring? what if you set 3 songs within 3 months or 3 simple chord base song within 3 months?
Change the title, it should be, "walking through life"
All the best!
-Indra

Anonymous said...

Same here...it seems as if the saying "we make our destiny." is a wrong statement. Destiny is already decided and whatever efforts we make, nothing seems to work out. what to do. I am also helpless.

Soulmate said...

@Indra - I write for myself. So it should be upto me what title I have to keep (not to sound rude)..

@Anon - You seem to be visiting the blog frequently and posting comments anonymously. Care to share your name please...

Anonymous said...

Varsha (Rains)

shuunya said...

Sometimes you try too hard to change things. Don't do that. Instead, let it go. Don't think too much, don't assume too much, don't try too much. Just be who you are. Once you do that, everything just falls into place.

D said...

I know exactly what you're talking about. Have been in this phase for sometime now. And miss being my old self. I wish things would start going right for us.

ani_aset said...

god bless you..hope you are fine