Thursday, April 30, 2009

Parents

Can they be wrong? Are they always right? If yes, why! If not, why! Well, this question is one thing, I have always asked. I dont know what is the right answer. For me, parents constitute a part that helps in bringing up the child and developing his thought process to make him capable of thinking in the right direction. In no way, there can be a correct methodology of bringing up a child. Everyone does based on their experiences and out of their own thinking/perspective.

So if one parent thinks that its ok to keep a child under air-conditioned environment during summers, lest he develops rashes, sun burns or gets a heat stroke; there is another one who thinks that its ok if the child plays out in the sun. This will develop his immunity system. The child shall learn how to bear the heat wave and survive. The child will accordingly develop his own thinking.

As a child, we always look upto our parents. For us they are the ones who are always right. But can there be a possibility that somewhere we may feel that why cant our parents understand our point of view rather than imposing their decisions on us. Isn’t it possible that the child may develop a negative attitude simply because nobody tried to understand him? The child was made to believe that the parents can never be wrong. If a child is not studying properly or not scoring the highest rank, then there is a problem with him. Remember Taare Zameen Par.. All the kid wanted was, some bit of understanding from his parents.

Can we simply follow what our parents say, without thinking how it may impact us. I do not question the intent of the parents…. Yes, they shall always think the best for us, BUT from their perspective. Sometimes, it becomes difficult to make the parents understand that while we do not doubt their thinking capability, but somewhere along the line, life teaches us, nurtures us and makes us experienced enough to think in our own way, which is different from theirs. Who said that there can be just one solution to a problem? I know a person who wanted to study Chartered Accountancy, but was made to take up Pharmacy and later he failed in it miserably. Why? All because his parents wanted him to take up Pharmacy and he never questioned them. I am sure his parents meant well for him, but the person lost on what he wanted to do.

Similar situation appears when kids grow up and are of marriageable age. The parents do their best to find the best match for them. The adult child sometimes knows that he is getting into a wrong relationship, but out of parental pressure he agrees. Ultimately who suffers? When you grow past 30, we are more of adults, ready to be parents ourselves. At that time, we do have the capacity to think and to know what is right and wrong. We do have the minds to gauge what kind of a life partner do we want. We can make out whether we can live with a certain person or not. While we do need parents for their love and support at everytime, but we do need our own space and the confidence to think that yes, we can be right as well.

Makes sense!!!

2 comments:

Sirop said...

Well, they are human... people... just like any of us who don't have kids. So, they can make mistakes and aren't mistakes unintentional..? :)

DewdropDream said...

Well parents do have their children's best interests at heart (most times) but just occasionally, specially in a social set-up like in India where the whole 'respect your elders' and 'elders are always right' mindset has been hammered into everybody's heads, it's very easy to fall into that trap of thinking one ought to follow them and their wishes purely on the basis of seniority. Even if one knows what suits one better than elders do ...